The Gilmore Guys: An Extensive Examination of Why Jess is the Best
I've been watching way too much Gilmore Girls lately for somebody who is going to graduate in nineteen days. It's time to talk about the Gilmore Guys—and not the mediocre podcast. Time and time again I watch Gilmore Girls and time and time again I am reminded that Jess Mariano is absolutely, positively, without-a-doubt, hands down, ONE HUNDRED PERCENT Rory Gilmore's best boyfriend.
He is sweet and smart and played by Milo Ventimiglia, and he does not get nearly enough credit. SO. I decided it was time to take one out of Rory's book and write a pro/con list about her boyfriends (limiting it to the main three: Dean, Jess, and Logan) to see who comes out on top. I'm certain it will be Jess (And only partially because I'm the one who is writing the list).
Dean
Pros:
He changed the water bottle (and generally did things Lorelai and Rory's way)
He built Rory a car
Cons:
He broke up with her after he built her the car because she didn't feel comfortable saying "I love you" yet.
He became CREEPY clingy and obsessive (do you remember the episode where he left like 85 messages and then just started showing up where she might be?)
He broke up with her in front of the entire town at the dance marathon
He married another person even though he was clearly pinning for Rory
He slept with Rory (negatives for her here, too.) while he was married and then was too much of a coward to tell his wife
He was bitter about everything when they did get back together in later seasons, and didn't really give their relationship another chance (wouldn't go to town events with Rory, once again broke up with her when he saw her at her grandparent's Yale Male party, told Luke he wasn't good enough for Lorelai because the Gilmore girls are "always going to need more")
There are far more cons than pros here, my friends.
Logan
Pros:
He pushed Rory out of her comfort zone (especially in the first Life and Death Brigade event)
They both like to study and learn about the same things (that journalism knowledge tho😍)
He shares her love of weird, quirky things like dress up parties
Even my heart flutters when he calls her Ace and smiles
The coffee cart was the perfect gift for Rory
Cons:
When he drinks he doesn't know how to control himself
His crappy family life is the reason Rory quit Yale
He didn't know Rory enough to know that quitting Yale was the worst possible decision
That damn bridal party (to clarify: take away the fact that he slept with them because the fact that he thought they were broken up is somewhat valid. It's the fact that he let Rory walk into a room full of women he'd slept with and didn't give her any warning whatsoever)
He didn't know Rory enough to know that she would be caught off guard at his grand proposal in front of her entire family at a party. KNOW YOUR AUDIENCE, BRO.
Logan has about the same amount of pros and cons. When Logan is good he is really good, but when Logan is bad he is really bad. All in all, he didn't know Rory enough.
(You can bet your bottom dollar I ordered these beautiful boys (because lets be honest, each actor is FINE) from worst to best so that the winner would end the blog with a bang)
Jess
Pros:
Three words: "What is much?" Those margin notes though
Further: they can debate everything and anything—books, movies, music, etc.—together and expand each other's interests because they know each other
He spent an exorbitant amount of money bidding on her basket (despite, and maybe even because of, the bad consequences) just to have lunch with her
He brought her dinner from Luke's when Lorelai was out of town
He gave her an umbrella when Luke's was under construction
Basically, he just did anything he could to make her laugh
He also pushed Rory out of her comfort zone, although in different ways than Logan. He created mischief (drawing a chalk outline of "murdered" body in front of Doose's), he pushed her to enjoy little things (the trip to get ice cream while studying, going to the record shop in New York)
He saved her from the neighbor's sprinkler, but then let Dean think he did
He did stupid things he didn't care about just because he cared about her (HE WENT TO A CARNIVAL WITH HIS GIRLFRIEND'S EX BOYFRIEND AND LITTLE SISTER—even if it was because he was jealous, it wasn't possessive jealously like Dean frequented).
He always 100% supported her and her dreams of going to Yale every moment (he looked the 22.8 miles up)
HE IS THE REASON SHE WENT BACK TO YALE
BECAUSE HE WROTE A BOOK F O R R O R Y.
(And therefore is the reason Rory and Lorelai started talking again)
He never had to prove himself to Rory like Logan did (RE: the awkward meal with the three of them)
When Rory came to his publishing event, he told her that if it'd make her feel better she could tell Logan they had done more than kiss. (AKA he just cared about her.)
Cons:
He was always sort of a jerk to Lorelai (but to be fair, teenage Lorelai probably would have also been a jerk to adult Lorelai. He's just MISUNDERSTOOD).
He was sometimes also a jerk to Luke (BUT: He eventually grew up and paid Luke back for everything, and that moment at the end of Liz's wedding is EVERYTHING).
Okay. SO sometimes he's a jerk. He left Rory twice without telling her. That's a jerky move. (I do think, however, that he felt like a jerk for being a jerk, which makes it at least a little bit better.)
Like I said, no surprise about who came out on top. Jess has 15 pros compared to Dean's 2 and Logan's 5, as well as 3 cons compared to Dean's 6 and Logan's 5. Now every time somebody tries to have this argument, I can just redirect them to this blog. No true Gilmore Girls fan would dare disagree with a pro/con list.
(Full Disclosure: if A Year In The Life was taken into account, I'm still certain Jess would be on top. Logan and Dean, however, took much different turns in the revival. This list only reflects the original series.)
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