Let's Talk About Chicken
On my way home from New Mexico I got stuck in Lincoln, Nebraska, because of an ice storm that was moving up the same interstate we were supposed to be driving up. And although I was more than ready to be home, I definitely was gonna choose a hotel bed and hot tub time over the ditch.
Now, I don't hate Nebraska. You and I has been one of my favorite Lady Gaga songs since 10th grade and now that I've got my own Nebraska guy I have spent quite a bit of time there over the past three years. But hands down the best part of Nebraska is all of the places to eat chicken (sorry, Huskers).
That fateful icy day I had Raising Cane's for lunch, and I had Chick-fil-A for dinner, which sparked the ever present debate: what's the best fast food chicken? Everybody has an opinion, and obviously to some extent it's a completely objective thing--I recognize that. However, I would consider myself a chicken connoisseur. And because I've had the two restaurants about the same amount of times, and I didn't grow up liking either of them, I'd like to think that I can be as unbiased a judge as you can find--judging based on quality alone.
I am going to grade the restaurants as if they are in college (like me!!) on a 4.0 scale. Because chicken is clearly the most important part, that will be graded as if it is a 4 credit hour class and lab. Fries and bread, the next important parts (yay carbs!), will be graded as if they are the standard 3 credit hour class. Everything else--including sauce and a "miscellaneous" category--will be graded as if it is a 1 credit hour PE or "welcome to college" class. I will be using an A-F grading scale with +/- additions available.
I've literally been planning this blog for almost a week. Let's get started:
Before I get started, I wanted to mention that I am judging Chick-fil-A on their original chicken sandwich meal and Raising Cane's on their Box Combo, as they are the meals both places are "known" for.
The Chicken
Chick-fil-A
For a restaurant that has a motto of "EAT MOR CHIKIN," the chicken at Chick-fil-A is one of my least favorite parts. The chicken, while not as processed as say, a McDonald's chicken nugget, does not feel as if they have put too much work into it. While it's not extremely bland, I don't taste anything particularly special. While it's not dry, it's certainly not juicy. And while it's still chicken, it's not something I could eat on even a semi-regular basis without getting sick of it (and I eat chicken in some for 2-4 times a week). Overall, it's just pretty average.
Grade: C+
Raising Cane's
I've never once had a Cane's chicken tender that wasn't warm enough to make my fingers get that tingly feeling they get when you come inside from playing in the snow to a cup of hot cocoa, juicy enough to ensure excess amounts of saliva/the use of several napkins, and tasty enough to make me wish I could fit more than four in my stomach at once. The chicken--which, by the way, falls apart with each bite you take--is never frozen, is soaked in a marinade for 24 hours, and has a crispy breading that juxtaposes the soft insides with just the slightest taste of something spicy. This is not "just chicken".
Grade: A
The Fries
Chick-fil-A
Chick-fil-A's fries are hands down their best attribute (except maybe the fine circular ice). It's hard to go wrong with a waffle fry. They are tasty, and they age better than most fries do. I decided to give them an A- rather than a solid A here because they don't have much seasoning on them. While most fries only have salt and are okay as such, I generally expect waffle fries to have more seasoning on them. All in all, though, they beat a normal fast food fry.
Grade: A-
Raising Cane's
Where Chick-fil-A succeeds in the potato-game, it is definitely Cane's weakest link. They're not bad; they're just not great. Generally anything that is in the form of potato is high on my list of necessities of a good meal, but if I had to drop one item from a meal at Cane's it would be the fries. To do crinkle-cut fries, you have to do them extremely well, and Cane's focuses too much of their energy on other things to do them as well as they maybe should.
Grade: B-
The Bread
Chick-fil-A
Part of the reason--other than it being their most common meal--that I ordered the sandwich at Chick-fil-A is because I wanted to be able to judge their bread and it doesn't come with nugget meals. For a burgeresque bun, it did a lot of things right. It was lightly toasted with just the right amount of butter, and wasn't hard nor soggy; I, however, also wasn't blown away with how amazing it was.
Grade: B
Raising Cane's
The Texas toast at Cane's is always the first thing I take a bite of, and I am rarely disappointed. When Slim Chicken's first opened in Sioux Falls, I was excited to see their meals resembled Cane's. I was deeply unimpressed when I had it for the first time and first took a bite of the toast. Where Cane's is light, fluffy, warm, and has a nice buttery crisp to the outside, the toast at Slim Chicken's was dry, overdone, and flat. It made me appreciate Cane's toast much more.
Grade: A-
The House Sauce
Chick-fil-A
I'm just gonna be straight up here: I would take ranch or ketchup any day before the Chick-fil-A sauce. Maybe it's just because I don't particularly love honey mustard or BBQ sauce, and it's a combination of the two, but it was just a little bit too sweet.
Grade: B-
Raising Cane's
The first time I had Cane's special sauce I was not too impressed--it didn't quite live up to its expectations. But each time I've had it, it grows on me more and more. I do think it compliments their chicken more than it complements their fries, but that is almost to be expected at a chicken place.
Grade: A
Miscellaneous (aka more biased, because it's not just the food. if you care this is my blog so leave.)
Chick-fil-A
While there are many options on the Chick-fil-A menu that might appeal to a wider variety of people, they put delicious pickles on their sandwiches, and I find the EAT MOR CHIKIN cow quite funny, they have extremely questionable morals (they hate the LQBTQ+ community and are killing the environment with their styrofoam cups, for example). I find ignoring those morals hard to completely ignore when judging the restaurant as a whole rather than just on the quality of their food.
Grade: B+
Raising Cane's
Every single Cane's has a picture of Elvis somewhere on the walls, which I appreciate very much. Their appeal to college students with disco balls and university memorabilia covering the walls is a very pleasing aesthetic which I think will make me reminisce about my college days long after I graduate. I also greatly appreciate the fact that they call their fans caniacs, have a tasty cole slaw recipe that comes with the Box Combo, and that the namesake of Cane's is a yellow labrador.
Grade: A-
Also: I was going to have a category on beverages, but the two restaurants are just about equally wonderful in that respect (they both have delicious, small, and circular ice, tasty lemonade, and coke products).
The Report Card (as calculated by gpacalculator.net):
Chick-fil-A
Final Grade: 2.91
Raising Cane's
Final Grade: 3.58
Don't get me wrong, I'd still choose Chick-fil-A over many fast food restaurants, but in the world of chains known for their chicken, it falls short. Let's face it: while Chick-fil-A is the MAGA-hat wearing, average "just chicken" fast food place that thinks they deserve more praise than they actually do, Raising Cane's is the Dean's list student who hard works to make everybody's hopes and dreams come true in the form of chicken-y, carb-y goodness.
I know this meme is getting old, but I made it several days ago when I started writing this blog, so I will leave you with this:
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